Calling

The question was: “How do you know if God is calling you towards something? Are there any signs that you can be looking for? How do you know that you're not just trying to convince yourself?”

This is a fabulous question.  Calling is something that we all wrestle with.  We want to be doing what the Lord wants us to do.  However, we often don’t get a clear voice that tells us explicitly what to do.  Generally, we’re left to exercise wisdom and discernment.

Our usual way of handling things is to pray about it some, think about it a lot, and then make a decision, hoping that we’ve made the right one.  However, I want to dispute this framework.  Yes, there are sometimes clearly choices that we should/should not make, murdering someone is not a good choice for instance.  But most of the time, decisions do not have a clear answer.  Both options could potentially work out just fine.  The framework that we often use when dealing with calling and God’s will is one which has us needing to “get it right”.  The assumption is that if you go “the wrong way”, somehow your life will be on Plan B.  In this case, God is not a very powerful or wise God.  He has somehow allowed you to bungle your life despite his promise that he has a perfect plan.  When we put it this way, questions about calling become much less angst-filled.  The pressure is no longer on us to “get it right” because we trust that the Lord will get us to where we need to be regardless of our failings as decision-makers.  Remember, this doesn’t absolve us of the responsibility to weigh options and choose wisely.  It just frees us up to enjoy God’s plan instead of fretting over choices.

Now, let’s move to more practical things.  What should we take into account when we make decisions?  How do I differentiate God’s speaking and my heart speaking?

Ok, so let’s head into a framework that can help us at least gather information and sift it a bit.  This is by no means the be-all-end-all of decision-making.  A good decision-maker with regards to calling and God’s will simply exercises wisdom and discernment.  Much of this is a judgment call at its core, so this could be helpful or completely unhelpful.

****Disclaimer: I stole this from James Forsyth/Liz Cozart who take it from Paul Jeon, so credit goes to him/her/really him/me because I was in that class too/David who pointed out to me where I had gotten it from.

 So as we think about decision-making there are 5 things in which to keep in mind as we sift options.

1. Affinity – Do you feel a draw to whatever?  If you are not passionate about the thing that you are considering as a potential calling, that’s a pretty big data point.
2. Talent – Can you actually pull it off?  Are you equipped to do what you need to do in that particular calling?
3. Community – What does your community think about it?  Do they think this is a good idea?  Do people who know and understand you well think that this calling is a good fit?
4. Opportunity – Do you have an opportunity to actually transition from where you are now to pursue this calling?
5. Responsibility – How does the calling affect the responsibilities that you have?  For example, does the airline piloting job that you have dreamt about call you away from your wife and kids?

Sometimes we have an affinity for something (zeal to help the underprivileged in Africa), but little or no opportunity (you’re a middle school student).  Sometimes we have opportunity and no affinity (great job, but you’d hate it).  Sometimes we have both affinity and opportunity, but it would wreck our current responsibilities (dream that does not allow you to pay off your student loans).  Basically, we’re looking for all of these 5 things to be in accord.  We want to have an affinity, talent, our community supporting it, opportunity, and the absence of conflicting responsibilities.

If you have run options through all 5 of those, and you still come up with multiple choices, congrats!  You are able to choose!  Sometimes the Lord allows us to just choose.  The short hand of all of this is that if you’re seeking after the Lord, being wise in seeking good counsel.  If your desires are in line with the desires of the Lord (read your Bible and pray to figure this out), feel free to choose what you want!

Now for the question about convincing yourself.  We tend to second guess everything.  If you’ve done your diligence, then trust that you’ve explored your options and choose already.  Generally, if you get good counsel (I mean good counsel, not convenient counsel), and you listen to it, you shouldn’t second-guess things.

This is a great topic, but one that is hard to personalize while writing through a blog to an anonymous person.  Feel free to come talk to me in person about this.  I’d love to walk with you as you explore what you feel like you’re being called to.

Blessings,

~Frank